


feel your weight in arms I’d never use

by MxBBadperson



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Age Difference, Angst, Bottom Karkat Vantas, Denial of Feelings, Hand Jobs, Internal Conflict, M/M, Rejection, dirk’s 16 and karkat’s 34, karkat babysat dirk through out the years
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:33:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27565324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MxBBadperson/pseuds/MxBBadperson
Summary: Karkat snorted. 'Anything you want right now?’ he asked.Dirk’s face grew nervous. 'You,’ he managed to say. Karkat’s eyes widened. Desire quickly pooled in his gut. Fuck. He was fucking *fucked*. Fuck.
Relationships: Dirk Strider/Karkat Vantas
Kudos: 7





	feel your weight in arms I’d never use

Karkat was in his study. He spun around in his chair with closed eyes. What was he doing? What was he *going* to do? Dirk was Dave’s little brother and he had babysat him throughout the years. Was he being creepy? He was definitely being really fucking creepy. He shouldn’t be doing anything. He *shouldn’t*. Karkat kept spinning.

‘You’re gonna get a headache doing that,’ Dirk said.

Karkat didn’t stop or open his eyes. 'That’s the point,’ he answered. 

'You don’t like headaches,’ Dirk said.

'I don’t but I want one right now. It’ll give me an excuse not to do anything,’ Karkat replied. Fuck. Should he have said that? It didn’t really matter now did it? 

'You’ll work through a headache,’ Dirk stated. He knew that for a fact. He’d do the same thing and he had seen Karkat do just that through the years.

Karkat sighed. Goddamnit. He stopped spinning then opened his eyes. Dirk was standing by the doorway. He had grown taller through the years and at seventeen sixteen he was taller than him. Though, Karkat thought wryly, that wasn’t really a feat, a lot of people were taller than him. His eyes landed on Dirk’s biceps. Dirk was lean too. Fuck, what was he doing? Karkat dragged his eyes up to Dirk’s face. 

'Is there anything you want?’ Karkat managed to ask. 

'A lot of things,’ Dirk mused. 

Karkat snorted. 'Anything you want right now?’ he asked.

Dirk’s face grew nervous. 'You,’ he managed to say. Karkat’s eyes widened. Desire quickly pooled in his gut. Fuck. He was fucking *fucked*. Fuck. He swallowed. Dirk looked away. 'I should-’ he started.

Karkat’s mind raced. He shouldn’t be doing this. He *really* shouldn’t be fucking doing this. He said his hands on the table. He swallowed. 'Come here,’ he said. Dirk moved towards him. Karkat stood up. He came to stand in front of him. What was he doing? What was he going to do? He shouldn’t be doing *anything*. 'What do you want?’ he asked again. 

'You,’ Dirk answered. Karkat swallowed. He really was well and truly fucked. He stepped forward and Dirk stepped back. Karkat kept walking forward. The back of Dirk’s shins hit the sofa. Dirk went down and Karkat followed him. He sat down on Dirk’s lap. He laid his hands on Karkat’s waist. He leaned up, going for a kiss. Karkat put his hand on Dirk’s chest. No, not a kiss. He wanted to but kissing him… That would make this much too real. 

Karkat’s other hand moved down. His knuckles rested against the button Dirk’s jeans. 'Say no,’ Karkat said, 'say *no*.’ He sounded so desperate in his ears. Did Dirk hear it?

'No,’ Dirk answered, 'I won’t.’ Well. Fuck. He really was fucking *fucked*. Karkat’s hand moved lower. He cupped Dirk. Dirk let out a low sound. Karkat unbuttoned his jeans and curled his hand around Dirk’s dick. Dirk’s hips jerked forward, mouth falling open. 

Karkat pressed his thumb on the tip. Dirk moaned. Karkat’s breath hitched. Fuck, that sounded good. He moved his thumb in circles, spreading the pre-cum. He slid his hand down then up. 'Ka-Karkat,’ he gasped. Karkat swallowed. His nook was wet and his bugle had unsheathed. He moved his hand, eyes on Dirk’s face. Dirk laid his hands on Karkat’s forearms and the cloth of his sleeves was clenched inside his fists.

Dirk moaned and gasped. Karkat felt the warmth, the weight. What would it be like inside him? Karkat’s mouth watered. Dirk pulled him closer. He leaned in. Karkat leaned his head away. 'Karkat,’ Dirk whined. Karkat shuddered. 'Can I-can I kiss you?’ Dirk asked desperately.

Karkat shook his head. 'No,’ he murmured. He turned his wrist. This close, Karkat could see his eyes. Dirk’s eyelashes fluttered as he came. It landed on their shirts and pants. It landed on Karkat’s hand. Dirk panted. Karkat took him in. There was sweat on his forehead and his mouth opened and closed as his Adam’s apple bobbed. Karkat swallowed. He leaned in and put his lips against Dirk’s. It was barely a kiss, just press of lips. Karkat moved back. Dirk followed. He whined.

'No,’ Karkat said quietly. He stood up on shaky legs. He wanted to sit down, he wanted to sit down on Dirk’s lap. He went to his desk and opened a drawer. He took out tissues then went back to Dirk. He handed some to Dirk. Dirk took one.

'What about you?’ Dirk asked.

'What about me?’ Karkat asked.

Dirk looked at Karkat’s sweatpants. There was a spot of red against the gray. 'I could-’ Dirk licked his lips, 'I could do it for you too.’

Karkat swallowed. Fuck, that sounded good. 'No. It’s fine. You don’t have to do that,’ he answered.

'I want to,’ Dirk insisted.

*Fuck.* 'No,’ Karkat said. Dirk stared at him then his eyes slid away. Karkat wiped his hand and they both wiped their shirt and pants off. Dirk leaned back. 'Take off your clothes,’ Karkat ordered. Dirk perked up. 'And go wash them,’ Karkat finished.

'Should I come back?’ Dirk asked.

'No,’ Karkat answered, 'just go.’ He turned to his desk. He went to it and sat down.

Dirk stared at Karkat. 'Will I see you again?’ he asked quietly.

'Yes. Why wouldn’t you,’ Karkat said, 'you’re still staying here for the week.’

Karkat walked out of his study and to the bathroom. He washed his hands. Karkat stared at the sink. What the fuck had he *done*? He was gonna deal with this for the rest of Dirk’s stay and after. Fuck, what was gonna happen after? Karkat wiped his face with wet hands then dried it with a towel. He came back to his study. Dirk wasn’t there. Karkat sighed in relief. He sat behind the desk. He laid his head on it. Fuck.

There was a knock on the door. Karkat knew that Dirk had returned. Dread pooled in his gut but Karkat didn’t raise his head. A hand rested on his shoulder. Karkat blinked. He raised his head. Dirk kissed Karkat. Karkat leaned back. 'I told you “no”,’ he said.

'You did and I told you “I wanted you”,’ Dirk said.

Karkat shook his head. 'Nothing’s gonna happen, Dirk.’

'Why?’ Dirk asked.

'You already know why,’ Karkat said, 'That was a mistake. I shouldn’t have done that.’

'I wanted it,’ Dirk said.

'It doesn’t matter,’ Karkat said, 'I shouldn’t have done that. I should have had more control.’

Dirk stared at Karkat. His eyes slid down. He stared at the floor. 'I think I’ll stay in Kanaya’s house for the rest of the week.’

Karkat’s chest ached. 'Be safe,’ he said. Dirk walked away. He didn’t close the door behind him.


End file.
